Words.

Assalamualaikum!

Words are powerful tool to change the world.

It's either can made someone's day or ruin their day.

I had felt it.

Been told by someone,

'You'd caused a great inconvenience for us'

It made me feel like my world was upside down at the moment.

I trembled with fear, and cried like crazy that day.

I will never forget.

While some other days,

I get kind words from someone,

'Be happy' or 'Be positive' or a polite 'Thank you'

Made me smiled all the day.

I shall never forget.

(It also depends on whom the person is)

The point here is,

I would like to advice myself to use good words to other people, because you'll never know what are the burden they are going through.

Simple.

Hasil muhasabah dalam bilik air,
Tatkala terkenang hari hari kelam sebelum nya.

4 February 2017.
Safiyyah.

Nightmare comes true?

Assalamualaikum.

Second post for the day.

Just finished islit class, where I am the only single student! Suprisingly Dr. M also said that this is his first experience to have only one student too.

Okay, that is not the nightmare I want to tell about.

Hmm...

From the first day of becoming a MA student, I told myself, I must finish everything on time. Which means in 4 semesters and that was also a reason for me to do my MA in coursework mode. I believed that the process I had to deal with is easier if I am doing coursework. So yeah. That was my impression at first.

So I prayed a lot for Allah, to let me pass all these in 4 semesters, and graduate on time.

But I dont know, if my prayer will be granted, or saved for better perhaps?

I am at that stage where I am losing my direction, I have no control over my own life. Bcs I have to depend on other people to accept what I want. (if you don't understand i don't care)

I do not know what awaits me tomorrow, next week, next month, next year?

Perhaps I have to change my life plan? Start all over again?

I am not sure.

For a moment I just want to scream,

I just want to cry my heart out,

I just want somebody not to judge me.

But console me and still believe in me.

I don't know.

2017.

Assalamualaikum!

So it's 2017. And today is the second day of the second month. Another three years to see flying cars... no?

I am not sure if 2017 will bring the best out of me or the beast in me? Haha. Many things happened lately, in the first month especially... I swear if I can tear my heart out, I will do it so that I won't experience the pain and the hurt, and the frustration, anger... arghh. so many things to think!

I had very bad moments in my third semester of MA (September 16-January 17), especially in writing my first long paper. It's so frustrating.. I'm frustrated with myself, a lot... :'(
There's a lot of things I shouldn't do, and supposed to do it better. :'(
Semester 3 sucks. my result also down :'(

And then with the allergy which hasn't got any better, at all! It really put me in a pressure, and stress. Not knowing how to cure it, what to do with it and all. It is a hard time for me...

Not only that, recently... on 29th of January, my car got into an accident. which I have not tell my parents, yet. Yeah, it is assuring that the person who hit my car will pay for everything, but you know... everything will not be the same again. And my baby (my car ;p) is only five months old. Still a baby, still cannot eat solid food. haha. only petrol lol. And the food price is also increasing by 20cents in Feb!! With that hike, of course it will affect other industries. Kesian wei rakyat Malaysia.
Nak pindah US pulak Trumpet tak bagi. XD

I'm back in IIUM for my last semester... just when I thought this semester, especially the add drop part will go smoothly..... no! It will not let me be in peace. I will have to confront Madam again and again. I cannot tell what is the real problem with this but it is putting me in trouble. I can only pray that Allah will soften her heart to face a 'problematic student' like me. My reputation is gone down the drain in this Mdm's eyes I guess. Huuuu... I prayed to Allah in my sujoods so that she will not go too hard on me. That feeling when you feel you are disliked by someone, and that someone is your lecturer. Huuu...

This semester also the final exam is fully abolished so the 100 marks is going to be from the assessments. I'm not sure how topsy-turvy this semester will pass but I'm convinced that it's going to be as complicated as I am! Hahhaha

I know I shouldn't focus on these things too much and just do whatever I could to fix and make it better. I should have counted my blessings which are far greater and bigger than my problems.
But my mind is distracted and it has made me feel down, down, down, downnnn....

So no positive vibes here in this post. Just want to release my thoughts and write as a theraphy, and one day I might read this again and be proud of myself.. that I managed to pass these hurdles and end it with a smile on my face. Huhu

Can't wait for ze convocazion dayzzz.

Till then,
Bye.

miserableHanani.
Feb 2, 2017

Lelaki Hensem

Menjadi seorang lelaki

Lelaki yang hensem menurut anda seperti apa?

Yang berjambang tebal
Yang berkumis nipis
Yang hitam manis
Yang putih bersih
Yang bercahaya nur iman

Haha.

Mungkin cukup sekadar sedap mata memandang, kulit yang bersih dan dijaga rapi. Kan?

Tak bermisai jambang pun tak mengapa, asalkan kemas dan rapi

Maka, seorang lelaki juga perlu menjaga penampilan diri, tak cukup sekadar gagah bina badan di gym, tapi muka kusam dan masam!

Lelaki pun macam perempuan jugak kan, risau juga kalau jerawat penuh satu muka! Blackheads merata-rata.. parut jerawat lagi. 😭

Boleh lose confidence jugak.

Saja nak bagitahu, set penjagaan wajah Mary Jardin ni sesuai utk lelaki dan perempuan 😉

Apa salahnya melabur sikit harini utk hari-hari yang gembira di masa hadapan.

Mahal ke Mary Jardin ni?
Mahal la kalau pakai sehari terus habis, tapi satu set boleh tahan dalam 2-3 bulan. Tak mahal dah aihh...

Isteri boleh hadiahkan utk suami tau.😍

Hihi..

Sekarang ada promo beli dua basic set, dapat satu microfibre towel.
Haa, isteri satu, suami satu. Cantik dan hensem bersama. 😋

Boleh pm saya sekarang utk offer ni!

#MJbyHanani
#MJGloriousGorgeous

0145147553

Kingdom of Pebbles and Tree

            Kingdom Of Pebbles And Tree

I am the ruler in a kingdom

Of pebbles and plastic tree

Each time I swim freely

They would sit silently

Perhaps they are amazed of my beautiful body

Or maybe they are afraid of me.

There is nobody to share

The feelings

I can no longer bear

I try not to care

Although it kills me,

I swear!

Oh my beautiful pebbles and plastic tree

Why can’t you listen to me

You know I am not happy

To live here,

And feel lonely

It is time for me to go

I can’t stand this any more

Greet the new king happily

And don’t just sit there noiselessly

If you don’t want him to end like me

Goodbye my kingdom

Of pebbles and plastic tree

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

another poem by me. haha. guess what is the persona for this poem? ;p

#notapoet

1140am

3 December 2016

Parody of Fire and Ice

Fire and Ice 

by Robert Frost

Some say the world will end in fire, 

Some say in ice. 

From what I’ve tasted of desire 

I hold with those who favor fire. 

But if it had to perish twice, 

I think I know enough of hate 

To say that for destruction ice 

Is also great 

And would suffice.

vs.

Fire and Ice

by Hanani

The world is not going to end

Neither with ice nor fire

From what I have remember

I think I know enough to say

Only those whose heart has fear

To spread love and admire

Will be bad and unwed

And would be dead

------------------------------------------------------------------

this is for my assignment on creative writings for ENGL 6512's class. hehe

we are assigned to write a parody of any famous poem.

so this is mine,

which i am not sure considered as parody or not.

lol.

1130am,

3 December 2016

Lol

Start dari fourth year degree sampai sekarang second year utk master, nak dekat hujung2 sem tu ade saje ujian nak membasuh dosa (hopefully)..

Ok la kan sebab at least dapat treatment ngan ubat free. Haha.

Semester ni, in fact sekarang ni dapat ujian datang penyakit zaman kecik. Dah beberapa tahun dia tak datang, sekarang ni bila dah masuk 24 ni dia datang balik😂

Penyakit alergik, org ganu panggil bedang. Mula2 dia naik kecik2 macam kena ketik nyamuk, pasti bila dilayan aka garu, dia akan membesar dan membengkak. Dia punya gatal tu Ya Allah... Allah je la tahu. 😌

Mase kecik2 dulu paling malu kalau dia naik kat muka, pastu dengan bibir jadi bengkak bukan seksi macam angelina jolie tp macam ikan hok bibir besor tu. Haha... malu bakhang. Biasa alergik takleh duduk atas karpet tempat berdebu, pastu alah jugak la seafood gituh.

Tp sekarang ni, kalau makan ape2 pun boleh dah tibai semua.. yang pelik bila alergik ni naik sebab cuaca. Takleh duduk kat kawasan panas sangat, or sejuk2. Anytime lepas hujan je especially time hujan lebat angin kuat tu, haa datang la dia.. menggaru la kitew.

Jumpa doktor, cakap alergik ni boleh jadi sbb stres jugak. Lol... damsel in distress sangat.

Penat tau layan rasa gatal ni.. abes mood nak buat kerja hilang. Nak2 time esaimen melambak ni. Hahahah... tulis esaimen punya la berat tangan, taip post kat facebook laju je mengarang. 😌😌

Saje nak share, tahun depan boleh throwback pastu tengok penyakit mende pulak nk datang. Kalau Penyakit malas tu tiap2 bulan ade sokmo. 😖

La ba'sa thohuuran..

(Post boleh dibaca org yg tertentu saja. Kalau awak boleh baca ni, awak la org yg tertentu tu 😘)